So this is Paul's life?!

Happy Mother’s Day.

Paul Deschamps — Sun, 09 May 2010 13:29:06 +0000

Happy Mother’s Day to the woman I love, this is your first Mother’s Day and if I could be there I would give you the entire day off. I know you’re doing a great job… Just know I love you for everything you are and do.

The future for our son.

Paul Deschamps — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 13:36:11 +0000

What kind of world is this? I have been thinking about it now for a while and trying to do my part to help change the world. It’s simple things like not littering, not letting my car idle longer than 1/2 a minute, recycling, walking instead of driving, reusing containers… I am trying to make the future for our boy a little brighter, I’m scared for him and what he’ll have to face in his life.

This is a call, a plea to all. Please do your part, those simple things I’ve done and do make a difference, and if me of all people can do it I am sure you can too.

To say I’m sorry.

Paul Deschamps — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 19:23:35 +0000

I want to apologize. I want to say I’m sorry from my inner most self. I am sorry about how I’ve acted during the past 12 months. I want to apologize for my ignorant mistakes and apologize for all tears I’ve caused you to shed. Your pain has always been my pain, your fears have always been mine. I want to apologize for all that I’ve done that you’ve seen as wrong.

Just know that I don’t want you, I don’t want this family, I don’t want your live, respect and trust… I need it.

Forever you are trapped inside my heart, mind, body and soul. My love is undying for you and our son.

Please know our lives are too short to let this ruin us, I want to be with you for all of our lives and eternity. I am dedicated and fully committed to you and our family. All it took was for you to open my eyes. I am not lying, I am not saying this just to say it. I mean this all so deeply and would give you my everything for a final chance at us.

I do love you, please know that. I will forever.

I love you both.

Paul Deschamps — Fri, 23 Apr 2010 15:11:58 +0000

I love both of you with all of my everything. I don’t want you two, I need you two… You are the only two things I have left in this world and I would stop at nothing to have you both with me forever. I love you both, forever and always. My loves.

It’s just so hard coping with all of this. I find myself fine then I just think one thought and spiral into tears and hours of sadness. I very much miss the love of my life, I can’t let her out of my grasp and even though they’ve treated me second rate and I still haven’t seen my son, I love him too, both of them are trapped in my heart for eternity.

All I can scream is please, please find it in your hearts to forgive my mistakes, please look deep in to your heart and soul and give me that last final chance to prove my love and dedication to you both… Please.

Everyday.

Paul Deschamps — Sat, 10 Apr 2010 13:25:03 +0000

All I do is think of you. I can’t live without you. I need you, it’s simple. I have changed my life for you.

I love you.

It’s scary how much she means to me. I need her, want her, adore her, love her. Every day without hearing from her is torture. I love her with everything I am and am willing to do anything for her. She is my life.

I can’t cope.

I’ve hurt too many.

Paul Deschamps — Fri, 26 Mar 2010 15:53:34 +0000

I’ve hurt too many of you, my friends, my love, everyone.

It’s time for me to go. You won’t be bothered by me again.

Believe me when I say I am so sorry for everything I’ve done and that I never meant to hurt any of you.

This is my goodbye to you all.

Take care of yourselves.

I love you.

There is only so much.

Paul Deschamps — Thu, 25 Mar 2010 22:26:17 +0000

There is only so much abuse one person can take from someone they love with all their heart until they just can’t take it anymore…

Scared.

Paul Deschamps — Thu, 25 Mar 2010 12:54:34 +0000

I would do anything for you. I would do anything to be with you. I love you so much.

I don’t know.

Paul Deschamps — Thu, 25 Mar 2010 01:00:09 +0000

I don’t know what’s happening. I don’t know anything right now. Nothing. Black. I’m drowning in this axiety and fear and I can’t gasp for breath because I’m choked out by tears.

My mind.

Paul Deschamps — Wed, 24 Mar 2010 18:27:32 +0000

I can’t think about anything else. My mind is ploughing through everything I do with just images of you and our son. I cannot do this anymore. I cannot go on in this life without you.